Wow, I’m not feeling super-inspired, writing-wise, the last week or so. And my motto is: when you can’t think of anything else to say - make fun of people.
Thus, the complete and unedited text of an email I received.
Wish to surrender, be blindfolded, restrained, whipped until cry/blood spilt, used by any number of males/females, like the star in The Story of O for however long you wish and anything else you wish, including branding.
All right, there’s nothing dramatically wrong with the basic idea here. But – why does this person not use the word I? People who don’t say I remind me of old Charlie Chan movies – that faux-Asian accent thing.
Nice to know branding is included. It’s always a pain when you get the contract and read the fine print and see that they want to bill your credit card separately for that.
I like how he/she specifies that they would be like the star of The Story of O. It was my observation of the book/movie that pretty much all the bottoms got those things done to them – but then, we are all the star in the movies in our heads, aren’t we?
But if you think of it terms of movies… Well, when I read emails like this, I can hear the voice of Miss K – she of the brutally honest response – saying “Why do I care about this?” Jae would probably say, “Yeah, and people in hell want ice water. So what?” That’s because one thing all three of us have in common is that we all have a background in theatre and writing. When you tell a story, either on a stage or on a page, if you wish to capture your audience, you must make them care about your character. A flat statement of need does not emotionally engage people.
It’s not like I’m trolling for slaves amongst one-line emails from strangers in any case. But messages like this certainly do not make me wish to add the writer to my cast of characters.