Mistress Matisse's Journal

Random Sex Tip #47

It’s been my observation that very often, when men are having trouble reaching an orgasm, it’s not because they aren't enjoying the sex, it's just because they’re thinking too much. They are too much in their head - and not the little one.

(Absent there being a real physiological issue, of course – fatigue, for example, or a prescription drug that’s slowing things down.)

It could be work matters that are intruding into his mind, or some nagging bit of sexual anxiety. It happens to women, too, of course. But I think with men, the trick is to do at least one of two things:

1) Give them something compelling to look at. Men are generally visual creatures, no big news there. So if there’s nothing happening for him to watch, give him something. Whatever it is you’re doing, shift positions so he can see you clearly, and arrange yourself so as to present the prettiest picture. Making more noise will probably help, too. That added stimulus will help occupy the part of his brain that’s getting distracted from the sex.

2) Put something in his mouth. I’m serious. I have seen it over and over again – if a man is having trouble getting off, a body part in his mouth will focus him and push him over the edge. Could be a pussy, a cock, a nipple, your tongue, your toes, whatever. No matter what it is, if you like it sucked and he knows that, then push that oral-fixation button, baby. And if he doesn’t orgasm - well, you’ve got his tongue in a happy place, so that’s all good. Letting him give you pleasure is a smooth way to shift into some other sexual gear, if need be. Cocks can get over-stimulated and balk. Giving them a little time to cool off and then circling back around to them often works better than trying to insist that they come now.

Naturally sex doesn’t have to end in an orgasm to be good, hot sex. But when you want one, you want one! So happy sexing…

Labels: advice