An Event Reminder For Local Folks
I'm going to be teaching a workshop at the Seattle sex toy store Toys In Babeland on May 23rd.
The topic will be "Erotic Impact Play". My partner Max will also be teaching "Rope Bondage 101". It'll be a great pair of classes, and a great opportunity to say hi to me! My TIB classes always sell out, so get tickets in advance through the website.
Which brings me to another thought…I do like teaching people about SM, and so while I get a lot of email from people who have question about BDSM, I generally don't mind answering simple questions. I think it's sort of a good kinky karma thing on my part.
But some people who write to me ask me for detailed explanations about rather complex BDSM issues or advanced techniques. Sometimes they want me to give them a lesson plan on how to do a BDSM scene with their partner. I usually tell them that I'd have to write a whole book to do these kinds of questions justice, and actually, there a number of excellent books on the topic already.
If you're interested learning about the psychology of BDSM, and why people like it, I'd recommend Dr.Gloria Brame's book, Different Loving. (She has a rather large website as well.)
Want to learn how to do it with your sweetie? Greenery Press publishes a bunch of easy-to-understand books on a variety of BDSM specialties, as well as some A-to-Z theory-and-technique books, like the venerable SM 101, by Jay Wiseman.
Looking for good fiction to wank to? Check out the Quality SM online bookstore. I also recommend the work of kink veteran Pat Califia, or my friend Jeff Gord's books, at House of Gord.
As I said, I don't mind polite people asking me multiple choice/yes-or-no, or short-answer questions. But I have neither the time nor the inclination to write ten-thousand-word emails.
And, frankly, I tend to look somewhat askance at people who aren't willing to exercise their brains enough to learn some things on their own. If you aren't willing to do a little work on your end – and yes, that may include forking out a few bucks to support some starving kinky author – then I'm not terribly inclined to spoon-feed you for free.
I sound rather severe, don't I? But of course, that is one of the perks of my profession.